[You never wanted to have children.

You were a kid yourself, you still are.

You don't know how to live.

Your are a curse.

You are my father.

And I regret it a million times a day.]

Every time you speak in a bad manner, or every time your face gets angry, I feel my heart get filled with resentment. It's just that I don't understand what could have caused your anger, I usually try to talk to you the best way possible so that you don't burst into annoyance or protests.

But no matter how hard I try, it's never enough.

You're only satisfied when you do your will, when you buy something you like and pretend everyone around you will like it... when you don't see the faces because you're too happy congratulating yourself.

And you don't even know what it is like to live with someone like you.

So easy to enrage, so easy to get mad at.

And so I have to keep everything inside, 'cause you'll never understand how I feel; and you will never be conscious about it.

That, especially, feels like a curse.

The habit of "getting used" to your humour, when maybe at one time you were terribly angry and the next minute you're okey. And you didn't see that you hurt someone in between.

So bad.

So sad.

So wrong.

So real.

Then I can't feel violence.

That's so not a "woman's feeling"...

Well; don't anyone EVER tell me about right feelings and patience and explaining anything and reasons nor forgiveness: I DON'T WANT ANY AND HISTORY SHALL ABSOLVE ME.

AND THAT'S ALL.

PD: THIS, is ruining my temper.

And still... I want God to take care of him.